Once I pick up the phone to use tools to help me write, I suddenly find myself looking at reels on Instagram to send the funny ones to the appropriate friend who appreciates good humor. In my quest to make a friend laugh, I have lost 30 minutes of writing time.

This day was my first experience with a cancer treatment appointment. Testing. Waiting. Testing. Hungry. Thirsty. Irritation. Waiting. Experiences with cancer treatment vary from person to person. Today, I learned a lot!.

I often hear people talk about God “Testing” them. For me, I see God as a place of refuge when all seems to be crumbling around me. I call on him for help and guidance. Without it, moving on my own terms and wisdom may cause more harm to my situation.

I saw an Instagram reel of Octavia Butler speaking on the topic of writing. The late science fiction author was sharing in an interview, her view on inspired writing. She said, "You will not always be inspired, but write anyway because keeping the habit of writing will bring inspiration."

As each woman held up her hand-sewn quilt and shared their stories, I saw the gleam in their eye and pride in each piece of art and history. Listening to these stories, I imagined women in the community sewing quilts together at a table or outside in their yards – as was the tradition.

A quilt has become a piece of history, handed down from generation to generation, yet the craft of quilting has faded.

In our most recent move, there was furniture we knew wouldn’t fit in our new residence. Gratefully we were able to donate those items to a non-profit organization name CRIS that helps immigrants in Central Ohio get settled in their new home state. One item we donated was a sectional, the centerpiece in the finished basement of one of our homes. It was great for movie nights with our kids and grandkids.

As an adult - 53 years old - I want to let you know something. None of what you are experiencing now will matter in the future.  I know there is a lot of pain.  Some connected to hormones, but some come from other drama we go through every day.  No worries. Life gets better.

Let me give you a little run down.

Returning home from my first ever line dancing class, I was exhausted. After two hours of dancing, I stole an hourlong unplanned nap on my couch. I woke up happy and excited.

On my social media, I shared my location at an athletic center and friends assumed I was talking a Zumba class or weight training. Later, I revealed it was line dancing.

I ate more than I should have. When I finished my meal, I climbed the steps slowly to my bedroom, stretched across my bed, and dozed off. I woke from my hour-long nap mad; I hadn’t planned to sleep an entire hour!! Then I realized I had nothing to do. No place to be. Suddenly, a craving for a creamy soup with garlic buttered toast came over me.

While working with a colleague, I shared with her a short story idea I had. It was a Christmas story. As she listened to me tell her about my idea, she began typing on her laptop. “What is the main character’s favorite cocktail?” “Is the main character a male or female?” “Does he have facial hair?” Etc. These are just a few of the questions I answered as she typed my answers in an AI, artificial intelligence application. Never looking up, she completed the questionnaire, hit enter, and read a flowery, narrative infused with all the information I gave her into a story. I was intrigued and surprised.